Why Do Men Have Specific Body Types?

Why do men have specific body types in mind for a mate when dating while women kinda do but not really?  This question has been bothering me ever since I read the Rules For Dating books. The Rules books stress over and over again that men have a VERY SPECIFIC body type and if you are not that type you are wasting your time trying to catch him cause it just won’t work.

When I told my bff this theory, she as usual said “Why is that?”. And I said “Well it is just testosterone, men look at the physical attraction first and women look at the mental attraction first” as John Gray states in his book.  But that rang hollow.

One night recently I was feeling sorry for myself for being alone on a Saturday night because I was single, separated and had no one to talk to that evening.  I went to the book store to make myself feel better. In the past I have found that solutions to my life problems will pop up in the form of books as I browse through the book store shelves. It is like a Karmic answering machine to my questions to the Universe.

This time the Universe answered with a book called “Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes?: Bodies, Behavior, and Brains–The Science Behind Sex, Love, & Attraction”

Being a psychology nut, I have followed many scientific studies about love, sex and attraction over the years. In fact, I loved the book “Love Cycles” as well for teaching me about testosterone cycles (more on that in another post).

Because of this, much of the book “Do Gentleman Really Prefer Blondes” was old news to me.  Fascinating stuff for sure, but stuff I mostly already knew.

Why do men prefer a specific body type in women?

Then I got to the part that talked about imprinting of parents on males and females and how it varied. You may remember imprinting from biology; the study where the scientist got the ducks to follow him around instead of their mother.  He “imprinted” on them that he was their care taker when their mother was gone from birth and they just followed him around like they would their real mother duck.

The kind of imprinting this book was talking about though, was not the mother duck following kind. It was imprinting of the opposite sex parent on the child that this type of person would be a good mate. I am sure you are all familiar with Oedipal and Electra theory.  Well, this study the book uses shows it is true. And it shows that men imprint on their mother a lot more strongly than women do.

So how does this apply to body type, in my opinion?  My theory was that men prefer women who subconsciously, physically remind them of their mother.  I haven’ t done any studies, but from the few men where I know both their wife and mother, I can see the pattern.

Mother Son and Specific Body Types

Mother Son and Specific Body Types

It wasn’t that the woman has to be a clone of their mother, but some aspect of their body type such as height, width, curviness or color reminds them of their mother.  The imprinting leaves them with the idea that the mother they know would make a good mother to their children as well.

Then I read another book “Come As You Are” and it had a section talked about some very relevant rat sexuality studies.  It said that this study showed that rats imprint on their first sexual experience. In the study, male rats were made to wear pants when first introduced to female rats. After that, the male rats in the experiment could only get aroused when wearing those pants!  So whatever experience led a man to prefer a particular type of woman from his youth, mother or other, leaves him imprinted with a type!


This information helped me a lot in dating. It made me less hurt if I was rejected by someone who was my type.




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